Such a struggle it has become to the men and women of the 20-something age bracket to live on their own amidst a society seemingly engrossed by couples and relationships.  It seems as if no corner can be turned or no door can be opened without the sight of love, lust, or a "platonic" man-woman friendship reminding us of our empty apartments and often lonely dinner plans.  It is so unfortunate that the sights of this world lead us down this path of lonliness, though.  There is so much more to our situation of singleness.  If we'd just take a moment to list out the pros and cons to our single lives, we'd be foolish not to acknowledge the countless positives we'd find.

Some of my life's pros consist of:

1)  Additional $$ that has not been spent on dinner/gifts/gas for travel.
2)  Additional time for friends/sleep/me that has not been given up
3)  No one to criticize my poor color-blind clothing mismatches
4)  No one to complain about my ever-growing facial hair, and finally,
5)  No one to make fun of the food I dropped on my shirt when I clearly dropped it with the intention of saving it for later.

And these are just a few reasons why, in the long run, I'm quite content to still be single.  I am who I am, and while I am single, I can guarantee I will not be wavered in who I've been created to be.  It is my wish and goal to become that man in the context of a relationship someday, but I cannot say that I could handle it this very hour.  But these five reasons are not the only pros to being single, and any number of worldly reasons still do not encapsulate the list.  We're going to take a glimpse at what the apostle Paul has to say about singleness in his first letter to the Corinthians.  His words are staggering and yet, powerful.  So far against the grain of society he has taken his stance, and yet, it's clear that he understands this concept immensely more than anyone else we're gathering our wisdom from.

In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul straightens out several misconceptions regarding both marriage and singleness.  People of the day seemed to think that being single and celibate was the only good when it came to their love lives.  While the two should go together (singleness and celibacy), Paul explains that this is in no way better or worse than marriage.  Throughout the chapter though, Paul gives glimpses to his own heart for others, as he does when he says, "For I wish that all men were even as myself." (v7a)  You see, Paul recognized the special freedom and independence  that he had to serve Christ with his single life, and he wished that upon all men, though he acknowledged marriage as a blessing from God.

Later in the chapter, Paul exclaims what has come to be used as the single Christian's constant reminder.  "I want you to be without care.  He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord - how he may please the Lord.  But he who is married cares about the things of the world - how he may please his wife." (v32-33)  Again, Paul is not discounting the blessing that God provides in marriage, but rather acknowledging the freedom that comes with being single.  Men joke about their freedom all the time when they chat with their buddies about relationships, but the concept is true, and if taken into proper account, it is clear to see that, to put it plainly, marriage divides our attention.

Now, this may not mean a whole lot to you today.  Maybe you can't see how your attention could be interfered with when it comes to your relationship with God.  Think about the life of Paul for a minute.  He was a non-stop missionary.  He wasn't a missionary as we see today, where you settle in one place for a lifetime.  He packed up and moved on repeatedly, through trials and tribulations, he moved again and again.  The Lord told him to go...and he went.  Can you understand how a wife and children would affect his ability and desire to move?  What about the kids' friends?  Where will they go to school?  Will the wife be able to find a job?  What if they don't like the neighbors?  So many questions swirl about in the head of a married man/woman that we as singles simply don't have to think about.  I know it has been easy for me to sign up on mission assignments where I had an uncomfortable mattress and one shower per week, but I would not be so willing to sign my wife up for such a trip without asking her first.  Paul never had to ask anyone other than God.  It was imperative for him to remain single.

Why don't we find it so crucial to be single?  It's scary to acknowledge, but it's because we are not nearly as in tune with the voice of God as Paul was with his life.  We don't see how our attention could be wavered, because God isnt' really our biggest focus.  Honestly, Paul's attention was UNDIVIDED, and ours is barely a fraction of what it could be.  Maybe getting married doesn't have as bad a dividing impact on us today as it did then, but that's only because our attention is already so out of whack.  Another scenario is maybe we just don't realize how great an impact it does have.  Maybe then, if we grasped the concept for only a second, we'd protect our singleness with a passion, and only give it up for the one that challenges us in worshipping our God.  Maybe...just maybe...we can do away with this "broken road" of relationships that so many of us face, and take up a highway of service and Gospel-spreading that comes with undivided attention to the Father.

I very much look forward to my wedding day (God willing), and I can come to tears thinking about my future wife and children.  I love them without even knowing them.  But the fact remains, God has a purpose for me, and how selfish would it be if I let the missions go unmanned, the outreach go undone, and the story of Christ go unspoken simply because I was huntin' for a wife?  Well, let's not let that happen.

Broken, by Him and not others,
Bobby